I always saw myself having a house full of babies, until I gave birth to my daughter. As she neared her first birthday, the inevitable questions started from friends about adding to our family. I reasoned that I never planned to have children close in age. As she passed her second and third birthdays, and as we approach her fourth, that explanantion no longer satisfies the curious.
My explanantion now is simple: we are not planning any additions. It doesn't mean it's impossible a few years down the road, but for now, we are perfectly happy with our small family of three. Our daughter is past the infant and toddler stage, the diapers are long gone, replaced by preschool book bags. No more sleepless nights, we now get adorable wake up calls and snuggly mornings.
This past summer, we were blessed to have my sister and her two small children stay with us while her husband pursues a career in the military. J who is 2, and lil L, who is 10 months, are adorable and sweet. They are also a good example of why im putting off baby number two as long as possible.
My sister is super mom, handling both children's needs and demands like a pro. No easy task, considering one is in the dreaded terrible twos and the other is a newly mobile infant bent on conquering everything obstacle in her path.
I have no such talent, barely able to keep up with my one preschooler, I shudder to think of adding the demands of a tiny infant.
I've loved the opportunity to spend time with my sister, and my nephew and niece. As they prepare to leave, I know it may be a long time before they are in our neck of the woods again. I'm soaking up all the baby and toddler cuddles, and hopefully get any lingering desires for another out of my system. And if that doesn't work, I just remind myself that the difference
between having one child and three:
MEALTIMES:
One Child: Family Dinners at the table in which you have time to model manners for your child.
Three Children: We no longer have a table, there wasn't room for all the high chairs. We now have a Finding Dory Kiddie table. Mealtime has become a game of Chase and duck.
TRAVELING:
One Child: want to Go for a drive, just snap and go,,maybe a change of clothes if you're still toilet training.
Three Children: Pack half the house, and while you strap one child in, lose track of the other. Cram everything in the car. Drive ten feet. And screech to a halt as you realize something was inevitably left behind. As long as it's not the infant on the roof of your car, you're in good shape.
BEDTIME:
One Child: If you're lucky, Snuggling, several books, and time to yourself once lights go out.
Three Children: Bedtime has become,a tag team sport that usually ends with one child passed out on the sofa, one parent crammed into a princess toddler bed, and other left to clean up the kitchen, and scrap the mashed potatoes off dorys face. (see mealtimes)
SHOWERING:
One Child: if you're lucky, they take a long enough nap for you to body shower.
Three Children: Forget it. If you want to shower, you better embrace your inner feline and lick yourself clean.
FINANCIAL:
One Child: Even if you're not rich an only child is bound to get more advantages when the families income isn't spread out amongst 4 siblings.
Three Children: Money? Isn't that the paper stuff we used to use to...whats that called? Purchase things besides diapers?
VACATIONS:
One Child: Once they are old enough, Vacations can be a a wonderful bonding experience.
Three Children: Combine all of the above, but add in 3 hours on a plane, a complete lack of daily routine, and seldom seen grandparents who can't help but over indulge those "little angels", and you'll understand why the phrase family vacation is right up there with "preschool acceptance letter, it's just a viral infection, and when are you having another " as the most despised phrases in parent world.
Seriously, love these babies and thumbs up to my sister for her super mom skills, and her desire for more.
For now, I will remain member of the one and done club. And if I ever decide to leave, I'll know who to turn to for advice.
To my Sister, one of the best moms I know, we will miss you all and wish you the best in this new journey.
